[x]

LostLost in thought

Placed in your head by another

Are you so ignorant

That you will not let me be?

That I am so wrong for loving as I please?

-Who Am I To Say-Who am I to say

that all is well.
that the sun rises.

that they understand
that all have their reasons.

that somewhere out there is still a better place.
that everyone deserves a second chance.

that there is still time.
that we still are able to save the world ...

But I´m just a kid
Stupid little kid, who dreams better place.
My voice is only whisper.

But maybe...
maybe...
One day my voice will rise so I can make difference.

...But untill that I´m only stupid kid whose voice is only whisper which no one can hear.

My story...I always felt I was different, but it was when I reached secondary school that I really started to feel like an outcast. Stupid little things started to get me down. I was constantly thinking about my sexuality, beating myself up over the thought that I was "different" and "not normal". I felt like an alien.

Finally I got the courage to tell two close friends I was bi. I didn't tell them about my true sexuality straight away, I was terrified, terrified that they would reject me. They seemed quite accepting though.

Then I met my first girlfriend, a brilliant girl who wasn't afraid to show everyone who she was. She lived quite far away. I did

Born I'm To BeI cannot help for what born I'm to be,
I'm different from them; that's they all can see.
They think they are right by trying to tame,
      Why might I choose this persona they blame?

Why it would matter if were this a choice?
Am I too small to present my own voice?
They have no right to speak for my speech,
      Rude manners those are, no care to not breach.

Love is not narrow, but they ruin our cheer;
      Their hatred is horrid; closed minds open fear.
They must drown in sadness to force on it others,

DifficultEven today I remember how I came to be part of I am today, it all had begun long ago when I was still little. The exact age I can't remember, but the feeling had behind everything. I was young, very young and I loved watching TV, sometimes when I would see pretty girls I would stare at them, it was confusing to me. I thought it was wrong for me, a girl to be watching those pretty girls or beautiful they were. I always tried to forget, to try and never look at them, but I never could, I would think. "It's okay, you are just watching them because it's different, doesn't make you lesbian." Time passed and I always tried ignoring the fact that I

Be Who You areI've always wanted to be different,
The guy with the Mohawk,
The guy with the weird religion,
The guy with the weird taste in music,
The guy who didn't fit in.
But sometimes I would be "the wrong kind of different".
The guy who was awkward as hell so they all hated him,
The guy who wanted to call you cute making you think he is a creep,
The guy who didn't want to say the wrong things so you wouldn't hate him,
The guy who wasn't really there.
Other times I wanted to be "your right kind of right"
The guy who called you a gay fag because everyone else was saying it,
The guy who repressed his true identity in order to be like you,

Who Can Say?Who can say?

Who can say that they've fallen in love quiet like I have?

Who can say they love someone as much as me,

Yet I've never glimpsed your face.

Who can say that they've fallen for a Greek goddess?

And have that same Greek goddess there to catch you and tell you she feels the same?

Who can say that they've had their heart stolen,

Stolen by a girl as beautiful as the sun is radiant,
As sweet as the sweetest dessert,
As caring as a new mother.

Who can say that even though their heart is stolen,

And though they're terrified of what could happen,
They know the person that has it will never hurt them.

Who can say that they miss

PredeterminedNot a choice
So they say
I have no say
In who I love
Who I want to make love to.
Well I say no.
I say I can choose.
I chose girls.
Girls are softer, sweeter
More complex, more naieve.
They don't hold
The coarseness of men
Or at least
Theirs is a different kind of coarseness.
I chose girls
Because they are beautiful.
Maybe I was born like this
Maybe not.
But I choose to believe
In my own free will
My ability to choose
For myself
Where my heart might go.

Dear DiaryDear Diary,
Is it really that bad?

I mean… To have 2 dads…
My friend Sasha came over after school today, and told me it was weird that I'm the only girl at school who doesn't have a mom.
I told her that I didn't need a mom if I had 2 dads.
She asked me where I came from if I had two dads.
I don't know where babies come from yet… Daddy and Papa told me that I'm to young to know just yet.
So I just shrugged.
She asked me if my Daddy and Papa ever kiss.
I told her they do, because they are in love.
Then she said two men couldn't kiss.
But they can. I see Papa give Daddy a peck on the lips before he goes off to work.
Sh

NumbersTwo for the hearts which fell in love
Seventy-seven for 'the crime' we are
Ten for places I can marry you
Seven for the land, where they kill us too
Infinite for these fearful nights
Zero for my hopeful sights
One for the second you close your eyes
Endless for our sad good-byes

Seasons of PainSeasons of Pain

Rain, rain, go away.
Come again, some other day.

There she sits under the rain,
Crying away all her heart's hurt and pain.

Leaves, leaves, blow away.
Stop tormenting her this way.

There she waits under the wilting trees,
Now all she wants is to scream and be free.

Snow, snow, go away.
Come again some other day.

There she lies on the cold ground,
The pain hasn't lifted its still going around.

Sun, sun, shine today.
Make her smile again someday.

There she is smiling, it's the greatest gift,
She got tired of waiting for her pain to lift.

Away with her pain, away with her sorrow.
No more crying, not today…

Time Has No HoldWhen you smile at me, when you text or call me, that look you get in your eyes when I bring up one of our inside jokes. Long nights spent on the phone while singing along with the radio we were both listening to, passing notes in class, or going out of our way to see each other at a locker in the hallway in between classes.

I still laugh every time I go to where you would usually be and then you go to where I usually would be – it would always secretly make me happy when you would tell me that you didn't see me when you went to where I usually stand; just the fact that your eyes search for me in a crowded hall makes me feel… needed

Dear YouDear You,

I am not perfect
I am not whole
I am not smart
but i know that you're worth it.

I've held you close to my heart
Close in my mind
It seems the only way
To make time go by

I realize that this may seem strange
I realize that you might run away
I wouldn't blame you
not for a second.

Love, Me

But tonightThere is a lover
who lies only on the other side
of a telephone call,
with eyes so bright and hair so soft
she must be an angel,
with hands as gentle
and fingers more clever.

But tonight,
that is not my hunger.

Instead,
I find myself at the keyboard
fingering the adagio sostenuto of Beethoven's Moonlight Sonata in C minor,
a poem which human language cannot qualify,
just as I always failed to accurately describe
the motion of the liquid moon as we lay under her,
or the motion of your dark eyes
as they followed her path—
until you followed her away,
leaving me dry-handed and empty-eyed,
searching among bars of ivory an

One of Them You know, I never was "one of them". I never wanted to be. Even before I came out, I wasn't one of the pack. Not that I was a loner. Not by a long shot. It's just that I didn't conform to any one, except my closest of friends. As usual when someone comes out, my life changed. But that part didn't. At least, not during school.

But then I moved out. I found a job. I got myself caught up in the larger world (id say real world, but that seems to encompass less than the larger world). I found work, (a real shock, considering our unemployment rate) at a local Home Depot, a store I had patronized for quite some time and was happy to find myself

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EotP-CH1: CuteA world exists just beyond our sight.

Occasionally, it brushes lightly against our senses, calling to each of us sweetly. Somehow, it compels us to join, seducing us into following it eagerly despite its cruel ways. When it finally has our attention, it welcomes us, sometimes gently but most often roughly, because once it has us, there is no escape. It pushes and pulls us until we're driven to the point of collapsing.

There are times that we can ignore its call, keep our peace, and dream about a sweeter world. Those times, it is most often just teasing us, because once it sets its eye upon us, it is only a matter of time.

We can resist all

And It HurtsHe's got this smile
That is absolutely adorable
And speaks such sweet words
Though his grammar is terrible

And it hurts
Because I can't love him
And I know
I shouldn't even want him

He's got this laugh
That could stop a heart
And a touch that feels safe
Maybe it could even stop the hurt

And it hurts
Because I can't love him
And I tried
But failed to want him

He's got this way
That makes me feel close
And a nature
I guess it gave me hope

And it hurts
Because I can't love him
And I guess
I shouldn't even want him

But I do

Gender QueerSometimes, I feel the man inside of me
Other times, the woman struggles to come out
In the end, I know there is no end
That is why I want to just balls up and shout

"GENDER QUEER!"

You see, this is what I am
Not quite a woman
But never to be considered a man

What is gender queer?
You may be asking
And I'll tell you that
It depends on whose answering

What gender queer means to me
Finally hacking of "what god gave me"
And waking proudly down the street
Skin exposed and questions raised
People as uncertain and confused
As when I hide inside of a hoodie
Inside of skin
Inside of what I could be.

To me, gender queer means
That

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Therapy

by ~Muzica-chan, Nov 28, 2010, 5:43:23 PM
Literature / Poetry / Emotional / Free Verse

She sits
He stares
Together
They watch

The two halves of myself
Yin and yang
Male and female
Writer and artist
Sit and stare

Together
They hold hands
As they watch

They tell themselves
That their presence is allowed
That being who they are is
Okay
As long as this works,
As long as they aren't completely
Abnormal

Therapyby ~Muzica-chan

Literature / Poetry / Emotional / Free Verse

©2010-2013 ~Muzica-chan

This was going to be based off a conversation I had with someone, buuut halfway through, the poem got way to personal for me to share, so I cut it off and turned it into something else.

The edited version was inspired by a prompt a friend told me about.

Enjoy~

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~Black-Ice-S Dec 9, 2010 Student Traditional Artist

NNNNNN BY NOW IM SURE YOU KNOW WHAT IM GOING TO SAY

this is wonderful <3

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~Muzica-chan Dec 9, 2010

Thankies~

I'm glad you like. ^_^

Thanks as well for the

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!vividrose Dec 2, 2010 Writer

i enjoyed it a lot good job

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~Muzica-chan Dec 2, 2010

Thank you.

Reply

~VampNeko17 Nov 29, 2010 Hobbyist General Artist

(:

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~Muzica-chan Nov 30, 2010

Thanks for the

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~VampNeko17 Nov 30, 2010 Hobbyist General Artist

No problemmm

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Mood: Love

~live-another-day Nov 29, 2010 Student Photographer

I love this. So much. It is amazing

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~Muzica-chan Nov 30, 2010

Thank you.

I'm glad you liked it. ^_^

Reply

!Alpha-DragonWulf Nov 28, 2010 Hobbyist General Artist

The second stanza... really speaks to me... you have no idea

I love this... Short, but strong and sweet. Lovely.

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